A year ago if you had told me I was starting a new blog and not one but two posts would involve “silage”, I would have snort laughed and said:
“A blog? I don’t have anything to say!”
And then rushed to Wikipedia to look up “silage”
Isn’t it great I’m a relatively quick study most of the the time? Any time Dr. Doctor asks me for an answer to an “academic” question the answer statistically will be “silage” punctuated with an exclamation point because I’m first-grader-happy I got the answer right.
We were driving through a little town that is home to a large hydraulic truck manufacturing company. The trucks are massive and they have these round spouts on the top of the covered flatbed.
“Honey, what do you think they put in those trucks?”
Uh oh this is one of those trick questions, it’s probably silage but the trucks are shiny like the dairy trucks filled with raw milk. I give him a side eye…he is chuckling to himself. Uh huh thinking he has the best of me and is going to trip me up like he did with the silo question a few weeks ago. But I’m tentative and I hate being wrong so I peep a quiet:
“silage” with the question mark inflection on the end. But the uplift in my voice wasn’t necessary because he gave me a nod and like Bob Barker on “The Price is Right” he affirmed I had the right answer. I’m the world’s biggest dork, I preened.
Later, because we drove eleventy thousand miles between the ranch and Denver that day, we’re poking along a two lane and there are plant bits on the road, off the shoulder, and in whirlwinds when we are passed by ruffian oil field traffic.
“Any idea what all those ‘leaves’ are in the road?”
I paused for a minute because they did look like leaves but I thought this might be another trick question. And I just know he thought I was going to say “milk” or “grain” when we saw the big trucks earlier. Seconds were ticking away, I needed to answer this quiz item. The bits blowing around were too small to be cottonwood leaves and they aren’t changing yet and there weren’t a whole lot of trees around us much less cottonwood trees. I took a stab and shouted like a Jeopardy contestant:
“That’s right! Damn you’re bright!”
We shared a laugh and I thought maybe that was the end of the whole post doctorate seminar in crunched up corn. But no: this giant truck loaded with what looked like grass clippings whizzed by us:
“Ok now, here’s a hard one.”
(He was being so ornery that day…)
What’s in the back of that truck?”
“Silage!” (I really did think it was the world’s biggest pile of grass clippings)
He gave me a clap and congratulated my exquisite and well-honed knowledge of deconstructed and slowly fermented corn. (He called it silage)
He is a smart one, this Dr. Doctor but I’m smarter because I’ve figured out no matter what he asks me, I’m going to shout out “silage!” even if he wants to know what I want for dinner or where I want to go on vacation.
**a week after I wrote this, he points at a cow standing on a mound of something in a feedlot and asks me: “So what’s that?”
I crossed my arms over my chest. THIS THIS THIS was the trick question. He thought I would say silage, but I knew he pointed it out because he thought I thought it was silage but I knew what it was:
He slapped the steering wheel and shook his head: “Damn, I thought I could trick you. But just so you know most people around here call it manure.”
This post confirms my first reaction to: “A new blog? You don’t have anything to say!” I just spent almost 900 words going on about ground up corn.